Saturday, June 27, 2009

are you ready for this?... family vacay

Well, much has gone on in the past week. So I shall start from the beginning so I don't leave anything out. As you all know, we had our family vacation to cali.

Here's how my week was...

Friday... Had to get all the crap ready for week-long camping and beach trip to San Diego, and it was a lot of crap, mind you.


Dropped my van off at the mechanic to make sure everything was good to go.

Saturday...

in the morning, still haven't heard from the mechanic. Started to get worried, so made phone call to mechanic.

mechanic says transmission is bad and advised us not to drive to California. Crap.
decided I needed to clear my head so went and played 9 holes of golf. Always does the trick.

While golfing worked my self up about trip to cali with bad van was a bad idea even though judd says is just fine. Started scheeming a plan.

Got home from golf, tried to convince judd that driving a bad van is a bad idea.
plan worked...
wa-lah
spent all night at car dealership getting van. YAY. I've never owned a new car before. I must say that I've now turned into anal car lady and won't let the kids even get in it without wiping their feet off.

Sunday.....still getting ready
Monday.

off we go. Everyone did really good on the way there. I have good car riding children.

The camp ground was really nice. We went swimming and froze our butts off. I love arizona. You can swim and not freeze when the wind blows.
we went to lego land and the sea life aquarium. i must say that i've heard mixed reviews about it, but I loved it!
We went to the aquarium first and the kids thought it was the coolest place ever.
the kids loved every second and they even did roller coasters. They were brave. There was one roller coaster that was pretty scary and after that one they decided that they were done with rides. here's some lego land pics
Here's where the fun really started...

I love the beach. I think its the funnest, most relaxing, best free thing to do, ever. We borrowed some boogie board and I was excited. We went to Coronado Island which was so cool. We had a mother load of stuff to carry down there and it was quite a walk from our car. Judd had coulson on his back, coolers, chairs, beach toys, boards, towels etc.... it was a long walk.

this was all I saw of coulson the whole time. He kept trying to go into the water I showed the kids to boogie board. They had so much fun for about 3 minutes. Then nolan tipped over and got wet, then the wind started blowing, then they were hungry, then they were freezing, then they were throwing fits, the umbrella flew away. Our beach trip lasted about 25 minutes. After all of that prep time, i was pretty p.o.'d if you can imagine. We packed up the mother load and had to go give the kids showers and the water was cold. Everyone was in fits. I now hate the beach and will never go back. ;) I was very mean that day. We went back to the camp and all took naps.
before and afters of Nolan That afternoon we went to seaport village, which I love. We had yummy pizza and looked at all the cool stuff.


Thursday we went to balboa park and did some geo cacheing. That was okay. I hate doing that crap with the baby in a stroller, but judd loves it, so i try to be a good sport. the park was beautiful though.looking for caches she was a poser that dayMe and Madi waiting for the boys.Madi posing for the camera.
teaching madi how to climb a tree

after that we went and did the midway tour which was my most favorite part ever!! its one of the navy fleet ships that was used during desert storm. they don't use it anymore so we were able to check out the whole thing. It was awesome!

This is the jail. I need one of these at home ;)
this is an F-14 tom cat. Judd's step brother Blake is in the Navy and this is the plane that he will be flying. What a brave kid! Just looking at that thing makes me nervous.That ship was so huge. I loved that part!

I went up top with the kids to see the control tower. we had to climb 5 flights of really steep ladders. We get up to the first deck and they start whining because they are cold. We had to go back down. I was p.o.'d yet again. In fact, I spent pretty much the whole time being p.o.'d. I really don't like being away from home.
That night after the kids were asleep we decided that we wanted to leave friday instead of saturday. we were all spent and wanted to get everything taken care of on sat instead of sunday. So there was my vacation in a nut shell. Glad its over. We did lots of fun stuff, but there is nothing better than coming home after 5 days of sleeping in a tent. I loved my house and I also have a new-found appreciation for wal-marts in gilbert arizona. California walmarts are the most insane places ever. a mix between old casinos and swap meets, only with way more people.

I think the funniest part of the trip is that Judd brought a fanny pack. He tried to convince me that this was a good idea and you have all of your money and chap sick easily accessable. What a dork. thank goodness that I hid it and he forgot about it. otherwise he would have actually worn it and would've been walking around looking like an old lady.

ahhhhh, I love being home. Now 2 weeks until I'm back in a tent for girl's camp. I will not take my bed for granted ever again.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Getting Real on getting over myself

Why didn't anyone with school aged kids warn me that summer time is a horrible time?! I feel like I've been running around in circles. I've been working too much, over scheduling myself and just plain stressing out. With all of the kids making messes and fighting and whining and wanting to eat all day long, I've just about lost my marbles. Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I have so many blessings that I give thanks for daily, but...I'm seriously stressed.

The story of late....

I have a husband that requires a lot of attention. Sometimes I like to say that he's the wife. He wants to snuggle and talk and wants me to focus and remember everything he says.


Now there's me. I'm on the opposite side of the spectrum. I've been very detached lately. Pretty sure its from having wild banshees running around my house all day. I've tuned out emotion just so I can make it through the day with out packing my bags and going to a hotel so I can just be ALL ALONE. Even just for an hour! I know I'm not the only mom who feels like this either. I give all day and work to keep a house of order, which mostly is in chaos, just to have husband come home and want more attention and love. I don't feel like there is anymore of myself to give. Poor guy.

There is something you must understand about me. I'm controlling. I think most women are or have to be to some degree in order to run a home. You do have to be a manager type to make it work. I think sometimes I go overboard. I just don't know how to relax and have fun if my house is a mess or if there are things to be done. I think this is always a struggle I will have. Not that I am a freaky clean person, just that disorder really bugs the crap out of me.

Okay, now is some serious venting.

I am confused!! We are told to have house of cleanliness and order. To have FHE and make sure that you have a fun lesson planned, Prayer, scripture study, family scripture study, serve, bake, have hobbies, learn new skills, get an education, raise children of all ages to be sweet angels, be patient, loving, supportive, organized, have food storage, learn to cook from it, be prepared for emergencies, responsibilities in the church, make time for yourself. The list goes on and on.

My thoughts... we are only human. I know these things are important, but they are driving women mad! (unless you are a robot, and I think I've met a few) Trying to get a grip on all of these things reminds me of a time when I went on a hike in the superstition mountains. I ended up getting the trail mixed up and started climbing up this wash. The rocks were all loose and every time you took a step some of the rocks would start moving and falling down the hill. A trail that should have taken 5 minutes was ending up taking 45.

If we try to do all of these things at the same time, we can have no foundation. We always feel overwhelmed and like we are trying so hard to make it up this mountain and it just seems impossible.

I have been so stressed and overwhelmed lately. I new somthing needed to be done. I took the weekend to figure out my life. So here is what I've learned over the last few days through some serious soul searching and prayer.

1. I need to simplify. This is always something that I have to remind myself of every year or so, as I seem to get carried away. Stop planning so much crap to do. when I'm in a hurry simple little things can feel like a catastrophe. I need to slow down. and sometimes Its okay to just stay at home and relax.

2. I need to prioritize. All of those things being taught to us are important, but almost impossible to try and conquer at once. The most important being FHE and family prayer. As long as those are our foundations we can work in the others gradually

3. I need to have fervent morning prayer. I need to start my day that way in order to function properly. I feel like I haven't gotten the chance to the past few years because I'm always getting catapulted out of bed with whines of "I'm hungry" and then my day is off and running.

4. I need to stop being so selfish. I signed up for this job. I decided to have these kids and now I need to get over myself and deal with my responsibilities. I need to love them and nurture them and take care of them even if I feel its cutting in what I want to be doing.

5. I need to get over my hormonal constipation and love my husband. He works every day for our family and has provided this home and a car for me to drive and my new Nano ;) Even if I feel like I give all day long, he still deserves love and attention. We made promises to love and honor each other. I need to work harder at fighting whatever chemical imbalance that is going on in my brain and just love him.

6. I need to stop comparing myself to what everyone else does or has. Honestly, I will probably never live in that beautiful $500,000 house or drive fancy cars. All wanting that stuff has done is make me ungrateful for what I do have. My van is ugly, but it takes me where I need to go. My house may be small but it provides shelter and is a place where we share memories. It is not for showing off it is for living in and I need to be more grateful. One thing that has helped me is to stop reading fashion magazines or watching those dumb celebrity news shows. I don't know those people, I never will, I don't care what they are doing or wearing or who they are dating. It has no bearing on my life what so ever. That pointless wasted time only makes me feel inadequate, when I am actually the one who is better off.

Through these last few days I've come to realize that I love my life for what it is. I love my house even though its cramped, I love my body even though its not what "society" says it should be, I love my kids even though they can be really naughty. If they were quiet and good all the time it wouldn't be as fun. I love my husband. Sometimes I wish he could be buff like Hugh Jackman ;) but I love him for who he is. He was everything I thought I needed when I decided to marry him and to this day he still is.
I have trials in my life. They may be not as hard or different from other people's. But what I do know is that everything that has been thrown my way, good or bad, has changed me as a person. I am who I am because of those times.

In getting over myself the last few days, I've gotten to know myself. My life isn't all about me. its about how I impact those around me. Its how I spend my time building my family up. Its preparing my children for their lives as adults. I've learned that life is worthless unless you share it, and that's what I plan to do.

Friday, June 12, 2009

playing tag

Tagged by miss Stephanie

Here are the Rules
1. Mention the person who tagged you
2. Complete the list of 8's
3. Tag 8 other people to play and let them know they are tagged!
4. Have a bit of fun!

8 things I am looking forward to
1. Our trip to Cali in 9 days!
2. Girl's camp
3. New Moon Movie
4. book four of the Luxe Series "Splendor"
5. Harry Potter and half blood prince movie
6. Book 4 of Vampire academy "Blood Promise"
7. Catching Fire, sequel to Hunger Games
8. date night with my husband!

8 things I did yesterday
1. cleaned
2. worked
3. took kids to play group
4. took kids to swimming lessons
5. worked some more
6. read a little
7. cleaned a little more
8. went running

8 things I wish I could do
1. hike the coast a Kauai for a week
2. run the Boston marathon
3. i wish I could be more patient
4. I wish I wasn't scared of riding horses
5. I wish I could see the Oregon coast
6. flips, Madison would like that
7. sing
8. dance

8 shows I watch
1. Grey's
2. Desperate Housewives
3. So you think you can dance
4. Big Break (golf Show)
5. Ultimate Fighter (because Judd makes me)
6. That's all
7. I would rather
8. read books

8 favorite fruits
1. watermelon
2. strawberries
3. pineapple
4. apples
5. oranges
6. kiwi
7. blueberries
8. raspberries

8 places I'd like to travel
1. east coast (the whole thing)
2. Ireland
3. Paris
4. Greece
5. Costa Rica
6. Fiji
7. Colorado (seems silly, but I've never been there)
8. Samoa

8 places I've lived
1. San Diego
2. Manteno Illinois
3. Kankakee Illinois
4. Tucson
5. Mesa
6. Gilbert
7 that's it

8 people I've tagged
1. Meg
2. Mary
3. Makenna
4. Kelli
5. Samira
6. anyone else that wants to...

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Quote of the day

Judd is coming out of the shower, with a towel wrapped around him, mind you. The kids just happened to be in my room at the time...

Madison to Judd"wow dad, you be having a lot of hair on yourself."

She proceeds to tell me... "Dad's hairy. He has hair around his nipples, on his face and even in his armpits. He's like some kind of hairy monster."

Well, I like to call it a carpet. What I really think is that his body hair is making up for his lack of hair on his head.

sorry for the gross post.

Monday, June 1, 2009

To Dad...

What does your dad do for a job?

Madison~fix meters

Nolan~ goes to school


What is the funnest thing you do with your dad?

Madison~ play football with him most of the time

Nolan~ play baseball



What is something your dad always says to you

Madison~ he says my mom is crazy

Nolan~ make your room clean



What makes your dad happy?

Madison~ when he plays with me

Nolan~ cleaning my room



What is something your dad is good at?

Madison~ my dad is good at school work

Nolan~ going to school



What did your dad like to play with when he was a kid?

Madison~ he likes to shoot guns

Nolan~ when he was a cowboy he liked to ride horses.



How old is your dad?

Madison~31

Nolan~ 51



How tall is your dad?

Madison~ he's like 6 pounds, mom, I don't even know what you're meaning

Nolan~ 50 inches tall





What is your dad's favorite thing to do?

Madison~write letters

Nolan~ shoot guns





What does your dad do when you're not around?

Madison~he just reads book and does tests on his school work

Nolan~ kidnap people



What is your dad good at?

Madison~ good at gymnastics

Nolan~ good at being hulk



What is your dad not very good at?

Madison~ skateboarding

Nolan~ arguing with questions with his friends



What is your dad's favorite food?

Madison~ pizza and sausage

Nolan~ noodles and chicken



What does your dad do that makes you proud?

Madison~does chores

Nolan~ doesn't fight with me



How are you and your dad the same?

Madison~ we both like to be together

Nolan~we have the same hair



How are you and your dad different?
Madison~ we don't have the same hair

Nolan~we have different skin



Where is your dad's favorite place to go?

Madison~ grandma and grandpa's house because that's his mom and dad

Nolan~ wal-mart



How do you know your dad loves you?

Madison~because he thinks I'm always smart

Nolan~ do not fight



What does your dad like best about your mom?

Madison~he loves her
Nolan~ he likes when she smacks him on the bum